Those of you who have read the past messages will be aware that a certain pupil couldn't believe I had been appointed Head Girl at one of the boarding schools. Her comments I felt were unnecessary and I recently arranged to visit her at home. It wasn't long before she was bent over and was receiving a well-deserved slippering.

When I arrived for last Wednesday's school however I was rather taken aback to be told by Miss Prim that she had received a complaint from a pupil's guardian and that the matter would be discussed in defaulters. Being on defaulter's removed my Head Girl's authority for the day. I tried to put it out of my mind but as I was wearing my "school" trousers and a fantastic new pair of boots with toes longer than the height of the heels I decided it would be better to change into junior uniform before first bell. I did put my dolphin Clare name-badge on my blazer so that the other pupils would know who I was.

Four pupils lined up; Tessa, myself, Tranta and Peter (a boy who had been playing truant for a couple of years). The fifth pupil, a new girl Sarah Hillary was late. Her guardian had phoned to say they were delayed. Exchanging pleasantries with the Peter resulted in the classroom door being opened and the words "Demerit Boundary, Dawson, Tranta. You know not to talk after first bell" were heard.

Peter was not so lucky. Tranta had told him not to wear his cap in class. As long as Ma'am could see it in his pocket so she knew he had one that was all right.

Sarah paid the price for being 27 minutes late. At which point it was obvious that she was wearing tights as well as socks. Her pale pink nail varnish was commented on but she had a note from her guardian explaining why she was wearing it. Permission should have been sought beforehand and even her guardian's note didn't save her.

Ma'am was clearly not pleased at the way the day was starting. It was now past 10:30 and we had not sung the school hymn. In those thirty minutes though Tranta was up to 3 demerits, Tessa and I were on 2 each and I think Peter had also managed to notch up a couple. With such a small class it was obvious which 3 pupils were singing the school hymn. Peter and Sarah were informed that they were to have learnt the hymn by end of the day.

At last, lessons were to start. No.

"Boundary, Dawson. I won't have you at the back, swap places with Peter and Hillary". This was unfortunate, as not being unkind to Sarah (Hillary) I could easily hide behind her, and so could Tranta (with me).

General Knowledge test to start with. I was doing quite well up to question 10 but after that Ma'am could have been talking a foreign language. "Question 15: Can you name two of the main languages spoken in Switzerland" Now my answer of "No" was perfectly correct, but would Ma'am accept it?

"Surely Dawson you knew one of the languages".

"Yes Ma'am but the question was 'can you name two' and I couldn't so I answered the question correctly and should get a mark".

"Do you want to be writing lines in defaulters about not being pedantic Dawson, assuming you can spell it?"

"I T Ma'am".

"Pardon".

"I T Ma'am. You said assuming I could spell IT. So I did".

You've all seen "the look". With only 9½ out of 24 I was last in the test and also below 50%.

We sat several tests through the day and with my mind wandering to what the complaint Ma'am had received was about, I can't properly recall the sequence of them. I'm sure we did English paper 1 before English paper 2 and I only got 51½ out of 70 on paper 1 but I wasn't last. But I did nearly fall into Ma'am's trap when she said "Last in the class...;"

Tranta returned from break wearing a rosette and I think that earned him his fourth demerit rather than 6 for a uniform fault. The consequence was similar though.

Sarah's earrings unnoticed earlier because of her hair were now spotted and dealt with.

Sooty helped Tessa and me with the next test but he suffered for it. Six with the rule across his bottom while with me and a further six with Tessa. Then we studied Teeth. Diagrams to stick into our books and dictation given we were told there would be a test on it later in the day.

Chicken stew for lunch with cabbage that the maid had burnt. Peter found out that one does not "waste" food and was denied pudding - rice pudding. Sarah bravely struggled through her pudding by adding lots of sugar to it. "What a pity Peter, there's you going without and Sarah not daring to leave any", Ma'am commented.

12 out of 12 for English paper 2 and 29 out of 30 for Maths was much better. 10 out of 24 for General Knowledge 2 saw me once more over the chair for last in test and less than half marks.

Pictures were handed out and we were asked if we knew what we had to do. My answer of colour them was not correct and an essay of at least one page was required. There were some good essays although Peter and I hadn't quite finished. They were to be completed in defaulters. The final test was, as promised, on teeth. Diagrams were handed out and we had to complete the labels. Not as bad as we had all expected and with only limited revision during the day we all gained acceptable marks and even last in the test was dispensed with.

Details of impositions to be completed were given out and then a short break before defaulters. With everyone on defaulters we were put on trust to work in silence, but I observed the maid had quite beady eyes. I was summons first and do not intend to dwell on what occurred. Suffice it to say that having been given permission to stand and having thanked Miss Prim my hand moved to pick up my blazer.

"Dawson".

"Yes Ma'am?"

"Don't think I had overlooked the badge who have been wearing all day without permission. Six with the Lochelly I think. Get over".

I guess Head Girls have to set a good example at all times and not break any of the rules.